Thursday, January 7, 2010

national 101 you should know

A funny e-mail send to me by a friend.

This is Malaysia - What A True Malaysian Should Know

NATIONAL EXCUSE FOR HAIR LOSS :
Ajinomoto

NATIONAL INSTANT FOOD :
Maggi Mee

NATIONAL BREAKFAST :
Nasi Lemak

NATIONAL LUNCH
Nasi Ayam

NATIONAL SUPPER
Roti Canai & Teh Tarik

NATIONAL EXCUSE FOR BEING LATE
Traffic Jam

NATIONAL FRUIT FOR INDUCING MENSTRUATION :
Pineapple

NATIONAL FAKE ILLNESS FOR GETTING MC (MEN) :
Food Poisoning

NATIONAL FAKE ILLNESS FOR GETTING MC (WOMEN) :
Menstrual Pain

NATIONAL CURE FOR DIARRHOEA
Cap Kaki Tiga. Down one bottle with warm water and you are all 'dried up'.

NATIONAL CURE FOR HEADACHES :
Panadol. The 'cure for all'. If it fails we have another secret weapon - Tiger Balm.

NATIONAL CURE FOR NAUSEA
Moh Fah Kor.

NATIONAL CURE FOR DIZZINESS:
Minyak Angin Cap Kapak.

NATIONAL CAUSE OF DIZZINESS (FOR YUPPIES)
Happy Hours.

NATIONAL INSTANT CURE FOR DIZZINESS (FOR YUPPIES) :
The sight of a police road block.

NATIONAL RICE COOKER
NATIONAL Rice Cooker

NATIONAL RUBBISH DUMP :
Anywhere. As long as it is not your house.

NATIONAL MOST MIS-PRONOUNCED NAME
Carrefour. Sometimes even pronounced as Carry 4!

NATIONAL ANSWER FOR 'WHERE ARE YOU' ?
- on the way.

NATIONAL OFFICIAL TIME FOR BEING LATE :
- 10 minutes

NATIONAL REASON FOR PRICE INCREASE
Petrol naik lagi kawan... semua barang pun kena naik ler... inclusive chicken meat?

NATIONAL REASON FOR PETROL INCREASE :
Still cheaper than other country la....

NATIONAL EXCUSE FOR CAUSING TRAFFIC JAM
there was accident on the other side of the road.. of course must slow down and tengok-tengok, kaypoh-kaypoh lah!

NATIONAL REASON WHEN REJECTING INVITATION
'I got some work to do la..u all go first la..'

NATIONAL REASON FOR COLLAPSED BUILDINGS & LEAKY PARLIAMENT ROOFS :
An act of God. Definitely nothing to with greased palms and poor quality control. Nope, none whatsoever.

NATIONAL EXCUSE FOR IRRESPONSIBLE POLITICAL STATEMENTS :
None. We were misquoted.

NATIONAL MINISTERIAL REASON FOR INCREASING TOLL RATES :
Orang cakap mau naik mesti mau naik lah! Lu ingat ini jalan saya punya bapak punya kah?!

NATIONAL REASON FOR HAVING BIG ONION DOMES ON TAXPAYER FUNDED PUBLIC BUILDINGS :
Dunno. It's not as if we're anywhere near the middle east.

NATIONAL REASON FOR SPURNING BAILOUT PACKAGES FROM FOREIGN CAR COMPANIES :
We're about to unveil another badly designed low budget car, which, coupled with our notorious customer service and corporate mismanagement, will see us bankrupt again
within the next 5 years. And so we have absolutely no need for the Germans and their silly car-making and market-positioning knowhow, thank you very much.

NATIONAL EXCUSE FOR JUMPING QUEUE (TRAFFIC JAM OR WHAT EVER QUEUE) :
Everybody doing what lah.......

NATIONAL EXCUSE NOT PAYING SAMAN ACCORDING TO DUE DATE :
Relax ler... government will give discount one of these days

NATIONAL EXCUSE TO BRIBE (ANY CONDITION) :
Give them minum kopi lar...

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